Sunday, April 6, 2008


Man....switching shifts has played havoc on my sleep. I was up at 4:00 am this morning and couldn't sleep. Bummer. The thing is, I LIKE 3rd shift. The kiddies are sleeping. It's quieter at work, and I can get a lot done. And the downtime gives me a chance to read more.

But on the con side of things, I'm having trouble sleeping. In a perfect world, I would be able to come home and go right to bed. Sleep while the kiddies are at school, and wake up in time to pick them up and spend the rest of the day with them. But I'm not able to sleep when I get home. And when I do sleep, it's not a solid 6 - 8 hours at a time. Which is giving me some serious baggage under the old green eyes. I keep thinking my body will figure it out, and I'll adjust. But here I am, wide-awake when I should be sleeping.

Actually today, it's not so bad. Wednesday was Ana's birthday and I'm having a "family" party today. Family means our friends. Mike and I have a rather eclectic group of friends that we consider our family. There's Aaron, my best friend. He's the kids godfather. An actor, chef, drama queen and all-around phenomenal guy. Ana's godmothers....Pat and Dee. They are a couple, and have been together for 15+ years. (Hence the term "fairy" godparents. Their term, not mine!) Dave and Jeanette and their kids. Your typical all-American family. Troy, the professional poker player and all-around badass. Tony and Wendy, the couple that keeps getting together, breaking up, getting together. Gina and Angie, another couple. Gina's one of my best friends ever. Love her so much!! So, it's not your typical backyard bbq, but we all love and respect each other, and that's what's important.

Actually, what's important to me, as a parent, is to show my kids that there are differences in people...and it's not a bad thing. They don't "see" color the way some people do and I'm so proud of them for it. Chad's best friend has a black father, and so does Bella's best friend. Ana's best friend is Chinese. I've known people that are bigoted and it breaks my heart. Aaron and I have been out on more than one occasion, and get 'funny' looks from people that assume we are a couple. I hate that. There was a local production of Jesus Christ Superstar a few years back. And Aaron had one of the leads....Judas. He was amazing. I took Chad to see show. He was SO proud that his Uncle Aaron was the star....he just beamed. He told everyone around us at intermission that HIS Uncle Aaron was the Star. The lady sitting next to us said, " he an uncle by marriage?" I don't think she actually meant any offense by the statement, but it really bothered me. Does it matter that we look different? Certainly not to me. Aaron has been there for me in the worst of times, being the best friend he could possibly be. He loves me and my family unconditionally. THAT is important. Not the fact that he is black. Or gay. It just makes him unique.

Why am I off on this tangent? Who knows. Maybe sleep deprivation. I was watching something earlier on the election, and they were talking about Barack Obama and how it would be such a coup if a black man could be elected President. People, it's the year 2008. Surely we have gotten to a point in our culture that we should be able to look past color and pick the person that would be best for our country. But race is an issue. I don't know why Americans have to put that kind of spin on things. But we do. And it saddens me.

I was having trouble getting in touch with Aaron this week. He always bakes the birthday cakes for our parties, and I was worried. I finally talked to him yesterday and he already was trying to decide what to bake. I told him, I was afraid I was going to have to get a cake from Walmart this late in the game. He said, "Honey, there is NO way I'm letting my God-daughter eat a Walmart Cake for her birthday!" See why I love him so much??

Hopefully, I'll have some good birthday pics to post later. For now, I'm off to the grocery store, and maybe I'll get a little reading done before everyone shows up. I picked up Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman last night, and I'm in love already. Magical is the only way I can describe Gaiman.



Chris said...

Sweet post :) But get some rest!! lol...Your a wonderful parent Steph for raising your kids the way you not building up stereotypes and boundaries around them. Nothing aggravates me more than that...I often wonder if our society is regressing or progressing...we're supposed to be moving forward, right? I'm sure your daughter will have a great cake!

Andi said...

Wow, can I share your friends?? lol They sound like a wonderfully diverse group. What fun! Good luck with the rest. I hope you get some peace soon.

Nymeth said...

It sounds like you have some wonderful friends. Posts like this are an example of why I think you're so awesome, Stephanie. I think you're doing a wonderful job bringing up your kids like that.

yay about Neverwhere! Can't wait to read your review.

Debi said...

Oh Stephanie, I love your family! They sound like one incredible bunch of people!

And I know just what you mean...I just don't get how people can raise their children to hate. Makes me sick to my stomach! I'll never forget the day when Annie came home from school one day (1st grade at the time) all upset because one of her friends told her she wouldn't be friends with her anymore. Annie wasn't so much upset at that fact, but at this little girl's reason...she said she wouldn't play with Annie anymore because Annie's best friend was a Chinese boy. WTF?!! You know right where that little girl learned her bigotry. Annie's first exposure to the ugliness of bigotry...and let me tell you she was one shocked little girl that people could be so completely and utterly stupid. Thankfully, this world is also full of people like you!

Hope your body figures it all out soon and you can get some rest!

tanabata said...

Sounds like a great group of people! Hope you had a great party and that you get some proper sleep soon.

Valerie said...

LOVE your Book-a-holic site! Very stimulating, very peaceful. May you and yours enjoy the journey through life!


Ladytink_534 said...

Now if more people were like you and your kids the world would be a better place! Congrats to raising them so well!

Carl V. said...

oooo...Neverwhere! I am so excited that you are reading that.

It is great to have an eclectic group of friends. I keep hoping that most of today's generation is getting a good exposure to a wide variety of people so that some of the old stereotypes and prejudices can be rooted out and destroyed once and for all.

I worked third shift in college for awhile and a bit afterwards and I can certainly relate to how hard it is to get the body used to that.

tstanley said...

We must trust that all the darkness in the world can not extinguish the light of a single candle. Pray for those people because hate is an offspring of fear.

Now, for your sleeping problem, checkout They make a light blocking window cover for night shifters that sleep during the day. They are easy to use and totally darkens the room. And you know, the darker the room, the faster you fall asleep and the longer you sleep. It's all about fooling the mind into releasing Melatonin.

Well, any way, I love cake. If you send me a piece of that birthday cake, I just might be able to send you a blackoutez for free.

Kim L said...

Oh man that is exactly why I can't work a night shift. Hope you get some sleep!

Your friends sound great and you are wise to raise your kids to understand that people are different at such a young age.